Internet Commandments
12. Thou shalt not downloadeth porn on thine work computer, lest ye be cast out.
11. Thou shalt *** EARN *** REDEMPTION *** FAST!!!! ***
10. Thou shalt not make for yourself a graven image of that which is copyrighted.
9. Thou shalt not pop up any unwanted windows before me, for I shall smite them immediately with a hasty click and read them not.
8. Thou shalt use no browser other than Internet Explorer, for thy Gates is a jealous Gates.
7. Thou shalt not forward chain letters. Instead, send these commandments to ten friends, and help save the life of a small child in Bogota!
6. Thou shalt not act like a hot 18-year chick in a chat room when thou art a pudgy, pimply-faced Trekkie.
5. Spam not, lest ye be spammed tenfold.
4. Thou shalt not spill your kinky guts and then click “Reply to all.â€
3. Thou shall not call thyself “Richard P. Smith†online when “Chesty LaRue†sounds so much better.
2. Remember thou the Neimann-Marcus cookie recipe and keep it holy.
1. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife – and thou shalt rejoice in the loophole that Tommy Lee is technically not thy neighbor.